(my heart seizes,
and i tell myself you're mine mine mine.
i still hope it's true. i still hope i'm not yet delusional.
you said some day we'll end, and i, of course, agreed.
i said it's your call.
you said you couldn't bear it either.

i said if i could i'd hold your hand forever and never let go, i would.

please mean it, please care, please don't stop.
the memories make my head spin, it's like a different life altogether, the life i get strength from. the only reason i force a smile, i keep running, i try to be good.

you're nothing i hoped for.
yet you are every damned thing to me.

without you i'm nothing.
and my wasted heart will love you.)

a disgruntled noise will not cover it.

i'm a lousy person. i had an epiphany of sorts. i make a lousy friend, i guess we all know that. right now i'd turn back bow my head and tell you i'm sorry i need to get over myself, we'll never be what we were, but thank you. for once caring. and well hey! i did too. :D

i'd be anything if you meant enough. i guess that's my weakness. you could kick me in the gut and i'll be back. i dont mean any harm, whether you'd believe me or not. spite eats me alive but i think i'm still human, deep down.

and you mean more than the rest of the world put together, for you i'd give up everything. but you disappoint and i guess that's on me too. i'm not good enough, too demanding. but i've always told the truth and maybe that scares you but i'm not going to hide from you. we've stopped moving forward for months and this bloody limbo tires me out to no fucking end. i will hold on. for us. but i'm not pulling us forward, not anymore. i could stay like this forever i guess. as much as my head tells me to move on, the heart feels comfortable whole. so rip it out and tear me up. it's on you.